Well, I’m Back!!!

I had a baby 5 months ago, so I am back on this weight loss journey. I actually started trying on Jan. 1st, and have lost 10lbs since then. As of right now, I have no exercise routine, I am simply eating healthy and cutting calories to 1400 a day. I hope to stay motivated, because I feel like such a hot mess right now! 250 is my mini goal, and I would be happy at at 200-225 range. Here’s to my future!

feeling fat again… YUCK.

I don’t know what happened. Over the last year I have stopped trying and managed to gain about 40lbs back. Today I had a horrible wake up call. I have a bad pain in my groin area, right where my c-section scar is. when I sit it is worst. When I stand I get some relief, but when I lay down it goes away pretty much. When I cough, there it is again. SO after doing some reasearch, I am pretty sure I have an “incisional hernia”.  Says that it is most common in “obese” people. Ding Ding, Wake the hell up!!!!
I started a new job, and I do a lot of lifting. heavy lifting. I can not quit this job. Sooo, I have to figure this out. Start getting back in shape. doing everything i can to lose weight. It is hard to go to a doctor and say, “see this huge ass poooch i have under my belly button, but above my c-section scar? well i think its hiding a hernia. feel it for me.” HOW EMBARASSING!!!  I want to cry because i was doing so so so well. I was 100 lbs down… and dammit i gained 40 back! I feel like such a failure. good thing I know what I have to do to fix it. I have to, for my health, for my kids, for my sanity. I was down to a size 12-14 & now I am back to a 16-18. Ugh. I need some encouragement people! I need a work out buddy! I need a walking buddy! I have a damn membership at the YMCA I have yet to use!!! Come on!!! I need to get with it. HELP!!!

Anyone want my old clothes? here they are…

Hi all! I have lost a lot of weight, and I am going to get rid of my larger sizes so I don’t keep them around to fall back on. Check out my ebay auction, and feel free to bid, the price is very reasonable for the amount of clothes. Have fun looking! Amber

http://cgi.ebay.com/Very-Stylish-Nice-Lot-Womens-Plus-Size-Tops-22-24-18-20_W0QQitemZ190152478491QQihZ009QQcategoryZ63887QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

BuddySlim Sending Me SPAM!!!

I am incredibly irritated right now. I have received tons of spammy emails in the past 2 days from. Any one else getting this garbage? Its like random emails that say “test” or just a bunch of letters. It is quite annoying and I am about to report it to AOL.

Why is it…

Someone needs to help me out here. I am a bit confused.
Why is it that ever since I have lost this weight, I feel more fat than ever? I know just by the size I am wearing that I am a pretty average size, but why do I feel so fat?
Don’t get me wrong, but there are times when I feel so good in my new clothes, but most of the time, I look in the mirror and I see nothing but tubba lard.
My body is so out of shape, 3 babies, 3 c-sections, and 100 lbs later, I am nothing but a stretched out, flabby mess. I have been working out, going to the gym, but nothing will shape up with the garbage I have to work with. I saw a plastic surgeon and was told I need surgery to correct any of my body if I really want it to be normal again.  I felt more normal when I was fat. At least then I had a shape! Now I have no shape, my boobs hang from my chest like half empty water balloons.  My stomach hangs the same way but its 5 times the size of my chest, and just gets in the way of my pants, and makes it so I can’t go down any more sizes.
I have worked so hard to lose this weight, and now I almost regret it.
I had a 44DDD chest before, now its a 38D but… YUCKO! they aren’t even like breasts. They are nasty, and will need to be both lifted, and enhanced to ever be normal again.
Anyone else have any of these feelings after losing weight?
I hated being fat, but I almost hate this flabby mess more!!!
Why ME!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

I need some sort of routine…

I am so out of whack. My work “routine” is all screwed up and I haven’t been to the YMCA in a month because of it. It also causes my eating to be all out of whack.  I was up to 221 again, and still haven’t managed to get back down to the 208 I was at my lowest in a long time, but I am at 216, which means that without even trying I have managed to lose another 5 lbs. I need the structure of routine to keep me in check. Even a hectic routine is a ROUTINE I can deal with!!! I asked my boss to schedule me all closing shifts so that I can get up early, put the kids on the bus, go to the gym, then work, and that would mean I could get back on a decent schedule. The bad thing would be that I would have to get up a bit earlier to go over homework with the boys, but thats the price I will have to pay. Hopefully tomorrow when I figure out my work schedule for next week, I will be motivated by what I see, and be able to plan on getting back to my “diet”.

Crappy Vacation!

Ugh. Don’t get me wrong! I had a ton of fun. A bit too much fun that is… I ate what everyone else ate, instead of sticking to my diet, and I am paying for it. I have gained 12 lbs in the past 2 weeks. I have decided that monday coming up, I am back in the game for real. I can’t stand the fact that I can put on weight so easily some times, yet peel it right back off just the same. Why can’t I just keep my fat mouth closed and not eat the bad stuff? uhg,…. I can’t wait for monday, but I refuse to start a diet in the middle of the week, cause I know I won’t commit to it.
So Monday, Hurry the hell up and get here!!!

I’d Hit That!

LOL! Actually I did hit “that”… Meaning my mini goal!
I made it to 210! Lost 4 lbs this week and I am so excited! I am going home in 2 weeks and hope to be below 200 for my family reunion.
I set a new mini goal too on here of 199. I can not wait to hit that “under” 200lb mark!
Pray that I make it quickly.

My #1 Motivational Tip!

Drumroll please…….

The number one thing that I do every morning, after I pee of course, is to weigh myself before I eat.  I have found that I am at my lowest weight in the morning, and it jump starts my day to think about that low number all day. Today my number was 213. This is exciting to me because this means just 2 days into my week, I have already lost 2 more lbs.
I find that it is the most motivational thing in the world to see that lower than usual number in the morning and know that you HAVE to eat right for the whole day, and exersize that day to try to make it even lower on the following day.  I love it! 

I have plans to go to the YMCA today and do water aerobics with an instructor. It’s free with my Y membership, and I have the time, so why not? Maybe this way I will also meet some new friends.

It works. It really works!

I was so unmotivated for the longest time, but this week, I promised myself to stick to every goal I set, and I did it. I drank a lot more water than I am used to drinking, I ate perfectly according to my diet plan,( no more than 1200 calories a day) and I worked out 4 days this week.
It paid off!!! I was up 2 weeks ago to 220. Last week I only lost 1 lb, and this week I took off 5! I am down to 214, and I am so incredibly happy to know that I am not STUCK, like I thought I was. I am going to strive to hit 210 by next Saturday, it is my own personal goal.
I did crunches, leg lifts, arm curls, walked 2 miles (total for week) and swam 3 days with my kids at the YMCA.
I can once again see that light at the end of the tunnel. Only 39 more lbs to go until I hit my goal weight.
WOOOO HOOOOO!!!

Next Page »